My first miscarriage happened when I was 20 weeks along. It was a drawn out process. I knew from the beginning that this baby would have a hard time and we probably weren’t going to keep her.
This miscarriage made me so sick. I lost a lot of blood and it took the rest of my energy. Spencer wasn’t able to be home much so I had no relief with Connor and the miscarriage. By the time I officially lost the baby it took about almost a month.
I asked for a blessing in the middle of it all just so I could function. The blessing mentioned that things happen in the Lord’s time (which I knew meant that I would lose the baby) and that I was having children when I was supposed to be having children.
So far a lot of things were happening to test my faith and as they were happening I was being strengthened. I am grateful for these moments no matter how sad, depressing or anxiety filled they were for me. I understand to others these things I was experiencing would be nothing and they could get through it unscathed without a problem. But they were hard for me. But I am thankful they happened. They taught me to rely on the Lord even more.
Two months after the miscarriage I became pregnant with Rylee. So technically I was pregnant for a year. My body did not like this.
To Be Continued…
Adventures in Carrolling 